please don't forget me

When I overthink, scenarios of you forgetting me keep coming up, and I can't help but feel so overwhelmed and sad at those thoughts.

For all 15 years, and coming 16 years of my life, you've been taking care of me, no matter rain or shine, you shower love on me, your beloved granddaughter. I know that. And I am really thankful and appreciative of your love.

It's apparent that your health is deteriorating day by day - I've seen it with my own eyes. Your memory's getting worse, your behaviour turns strange sometimes and I've saw you start kicking up a fuss because you've had your hallucinations. Even if I don't want to accept that fact, it's true. I can't change anything. But I know that you're still my grandma that I'll always love for eternity, for all my life, for you're my family. And no matter how much trouble you think you might have brought to me even though you didn't, please know that it's never a chore for me to attend to you. I feel really happy to be able to spend time with you, especially when my school life is so hectic; when I am able to free up time just to sit down and watch television with you, or just talk to you, believe me, I am really happy and thankful.

Even though your health is deteriorating, I know your love for me isn't. It is still unwavering as before; and I can even feel our bond growing stronger as I grow up each day. You cook for me, care for me and do so much for me. To separate us would be an act of insanity, because you would never be able to do so. I find it very difficult for me to part with her, or be ignorant of her existence.

No matter how old, how unreasonable, or how stubborn you might be, you're still the best grandma to me, and the closest to my heart. Whatever you may forget, I will remind you. If you forget again, I will remind you; and again, and again. If you forget what day is it, I will remind you. If you forget to eat your medicine, I will remind you. If you forget what time I'm coming home tonight, I'll draw up a timetable for you, and call home as frequently as you can. When you feel lonely, give me a call and I'll free my time to talk to you, I promise.

But please do not forget me, my beloved grandma.